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Past columns and submission guidelines are at latimes.com/laaffairs Throwing a line into the cyber-fishing pond for a date on a Friday night is as scary as it is (too) easy. Sure, I was originally hoping to find someone to grow old with, but, if the gods hand you a lemon, make lemon meringue.I'd had a 16-year marriage that ended in divorce six years ago, and my 18-year-old daughter was finally off at college. Frind readily admits that he only works a week on this site. It's a fully functional dating service without cost.Which leads us to our most important point: POF latched onto one, simple idea: create a totally free online dating site. Don't confuse this with other sites that say they are "free." Sure, they are free. may offer a free version, but it's just an inducement to sign up for the pay version.After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website.POF is a complete scam design to create traffic to their website. There are legitimate profiles but any email correspondence are viewed or blocked by POF as to get the user to upgrade their account at a monthly fee. If POF didn't block your email then why should you need to upgrade. If you attempt to include any type of contact info in your email, such as phone number or email address then POF will delete your account. "I'm sensing that you want me to be there," he wrote. "I sat on it for three hours but I was secretly smiling. PCH and 7th in Long Beach, at 8 pm," I finally replied. A Gen-X, computer-whiz engineer working ridiculously long hours in the aerospace industry. I played very hard to get (because I am), but he ignored it. " I thought to myself, "That will surely get rid of him." But Sunday afternoon arrived, and lo and behold, a text popped up: "Where do you want to meet? Affairs columns, and submission guidelines"Meet me at Sapporo Sushi. So, what Cracker Jack prize did I get, you might wonder?

Affairs is our weekly column about the current dating scene in and around Los Angeles -- and finding romance in a wired world. I signed up on the dating site Plenty of Fish last year, and while I had my doubts, I was still optimistic about finding my soul mate — otherwise, why do it at all? It's taken me a while, but I realize now that this living fantasy is one of the perks of being a self-confident woman "of a certain age," and one should embrace it like the feminist superhero that you are. In the 1990 movie "White Palace," a young James Spader moves to New York in the finale to declare his love to the much older Susan Sarandon, but in real life, would James really have done that? In Hollywood, one can dream, but in America, the jury's still out.

But POF knows that some people will fork over money for basically nothing; they'd be dumb not to take advantage of this human trait.

That's why POF does offer an upgraded version for between .78 and .90 a month.

"I had to change my age to be in the right category to meet you."We bantered back and forth for quite a bit. "OK, call me on Sunday then, and make a date." "Ha! He paid for dinner and I was happy — three bottles of sake happy.

The next day, Saturday, my curiosity got the better of me and I texted him. We ate sushi and drank lots of sake, and he started to look more his age.

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Not many serial killers from New Hampshire, I reasoned.

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